That was Ella’s temperature yesterday. She threw up dinner and then breakfast. Its the first time she has been sick sick. She has had colds here and there but she has managed to be far healthier than her big brother ever was at her age. Funny? My little weakened immune system designer genes girl. This too is a blessing, because unlike with Jakob…or like with Jakob, everytime my little ones get sick I start worrying about the worst. What if? What if? What if? It’s a horrible way to live and reflects a deeper trust issue with God that I have to work through. When I had Ella, I thought to myself Yeah, that would happen to me. I’ve talked about this before in this post. But regardless, part of working through that trust issue is recognizing the blessings of every situation that I encounter.
Last night I was so thankful for the nurse in Emerg. She was my nurse for a few days when I was in the hospital with Ella after she was born. She was kind, and although at the time she remarked at my “post-partum emotions” (I call them – normal, I think my child has Down Syndrome emotions) she was always very supportive. I remember breaking down when Ella had to go under the lights for her jaundice. She cried and cried and all I wanted to do was hold her. go home. run away. Now, I look back and recognize how blessed I was. How blessed I was to have Ella here in Three Hills, where there is no NICU to whisk her away to, not that anyone would have thought to – nobody seemed to believe me when I said I thought she had Down Syndrome – that, or they just didn’t want to say it to my face. But regardless, I am so thankful that she was able to stay with me. That we could work through nursing, bond in the wee hours of the morning and spend time with family and all of my wonderful friends who came to visit.
Ella seems to be doing better today. Her fever is down and she seems more herself (aside from not really wanting to eat and throwing up the only toast she would accept.)
Blessings, Happy Monday!