First of all, thank you.
Thank you to all of you who commented or emailed to encourage, to give a virtual hug and to say, “you are not alone.”
After 6 years of blogging you would think that I would know full well that everyone has a bad day now and again. Every mother stumbles from time to time causing her to question her adequacy, her calling, her innate ability to nurture.
But we are on this journey together and when one falls, the others are there to pick our comrade up.
Life is hard and is rarely what we expect it to be. Everyday is new and the beginning of every chapter full of the discomfort that comes with a new pair of leather shoes. There might be blisters, there may be blood, but with weathering comes the soft worn-in leather as smooth as a baby’s bum.
And in times when we crave comfort, we exhale as we slip our feet into those cosy slippers and suddenly know we’re home.
Some days, home seems closer than others but these things can’t be rushed.
Our move to Vancouver has been fruitful and it seems that the really bad days are fewer and further between. City life suits me and it suits Ben. Here are a few differences that we’ve notice, for better or worse.
1. We drive less. We are rarely in the car for more than 15 minutes. I often walk to work, or cycle with Jakob on the bike trailer. This past weekend, the whole family biked to Granville Island. For me, this was a dream come true. Furthermore, we very rarely have to shift into 5th gear, buy maybe one tank of gas a week and I keep finding myself checking the odometer in anticipation of the next oil change because it seems so long since the last.
2. We do laundry less…because each load cost $3.50
3. We eat out less. This is probably surprising to many of you. Most people think that you would eat out more living in the city because there are so many great restaurants within a 5 km radius but the reality is, is that we were always on the run when we lived in Ladner, which meant meals on the run. Now, I actually have time to drive/walk/bike/skip home after the kids activities and make dinner.
4. We go to the beach more. We live less than a kilometre away from the beach so it is a frequent destination after school or on the weekends. This is Soren’s favourite feature.
5. We talk to our neighbours more. We live in a 1910 heritage house divided into 4 suites. There is an identical house next door which is also owned by our landlord and together we share a yard with a patio and community garden. As people are often coming and going, there is opportunity to chat, say hello and even garden alongside our neighbours. It’s nice. I like it.
Jakob is adjusting to his new school. Sometimes, I feel bad about moving him around so much. It is hard for him to see that both Ben and I are around more, now that we’re not on the road 20 hrs a week. We are confident that this increased time we have with him, will have a big impact down the road. And while he does complain a lot, sometimes he surprises me with what a caring gentleman he can be.
|She has no fear. Always reaching, always striving. Like her mama when I was young, she doesn’t know there is anything to fear. I will work to preserve this for as long as I live.|
|Doesn’t she look like such a big girl in this picture. Almost 5 years old. Hard to believe.|
I am hopeful this is just the beginning of great things – the thaw after a long winter. Everyday is a battle to keep my heart aligned with grace and gratitude but as I’ve said, I’ll never stop trying. It’s not in my DNA.